In Our Own Words

"It's Only Tuesday"

Here is our point up front we used to call it BLUF(Bottom Line Up Front): you don’t go from being successful in military service to incapable, homeless, drug addicted, or mental ill, just by getting out of the military. The only thing wrong with these Veterans is they are out of their environment.

We give You this example so if you only speak one language let’s use Spanish you understand no other language and they do not understand you, in China.

You have been here two weeks and were told good luck, here is your resume, this is how you find a job and be successful, thank you for your Service.

 Everyone who walks past you, speaking mandarin of course, is saying “I don’t know why they don’t do something about them! GO BE SUCCESSFUL YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN WHAT YOU NEED.”

 We know a man who gets very talkative when he is nervous, he just runs that mouth about anything to try and deal with his anxiety during the moment. Often this goes poorly for him, this same man had applied for Social Security Disability. The VA said he was broken and those around him at the time, said that’s what he should do.

Now we know, this is a nervous excitable Veteran applying for Social Security disability. The time came they had scheduled an evaluation for him, he arrives at the doctor’s office and the first question asked, “how are you doing today?” Like most Veterans, his sense of humor must be understood from their perspective. He answers “I am alright, Sobriety sure sucks, WOW! BOB is bright today.”  another question was asked at some point about when this Veteran last worked, and what happened when he was let go? He responded “Hell, I flew in Lobster, Crab, and celebrated, they were all fucking assholes.”

Some insight, the social security administration denied this Veterans claim. They determined based upon his answers to the Doctors and Therapists he was not Disabled. He was out of work by his own choice and was an alcoholic.

 The Veteran wasted two years of his life because he couldn’t work while waiting or they would deny his claim, the VA is telling him he is broken. The responses he gave to the questions, I would argue, if you didn’t know Veterans should be a red flag that this guy may be disabled upstairs. There were many other instances in his story that showed he was challenged. We don’t think any Veteran is incapable of performing, or working, or owning, or building, we believe Veterans are not broken society just doesn’t understand them and most of them don’t speak Mandarin.

I didn’t want this to become too long but I think I need to add more examples, so all these statements and stories are from Veterans. We have removed the names or identifying information, we will let them tell you in their own words.

“I’ve been out for a while now, but some things are just hard-coded. No matter how long it’s been, there’s stuff civilians just won't ever really understand. Like urgency or timeliness. In the Army, you move fast because it’s baked into you from day one. fifteen minutes early is just on time. Since I got out, I have what I call time-anxiety. Even when I try to be late, I'm still on time, by that I mean I'm still early” –GD

“The speed in which I eat. Specifically avoid going to expensive restaurants with the wife because of it” –SS

“I went the opposite. I became the slowest eater at the table” –TFE

“My life is ruled by alarms that give me 5 minute warnings at least 30 minutes out so I can be 5-10 minutes early. I've been out almost 15 years” -LE

These are learned behaviors that we embrace as Veterans, laugh about when they help us to be successful, however what happens when these things become a hinderance to your situation? They prevent you from functioning in the environment you have been trying to integrate into, that’s when it comes off the rails so to speak and these guys find themselves alone. I know we are not alone you can call for help, all of those ideas are relatively new how can you expect someone, who still sets an alarm early 15 or 30 years after service, you cannot expect a Veteran to ask for help when they were taught there is no help. They were trained you are alone when you are away from your comrades. The environment and the approach must change, or your children’s grandchildren, will be subject to the same, after serving Your neighbors children’s grandchildren.

“15 minutes early is on time, on time is late, and late is screwed” - DM

“I've been out 26 years and still follow this rule. My wife and kids, on the other hand” -JJL

“I set the clock in my car 15 minutes fast” -LC

“Yeah, being on time. I enlisted 42 years ago and only served 3 years on active duty, but that stuck with me” -JDM

Its more than time management, we don’t even discuss amongst ourselves some of the other habits or muscle memory we cannot shake. Some Veterans can embrace these or work past without help, but there are many other factors that lead to a Veteran success or facing obstacle upon transition. I am saying we taught them, punished them when they didn’t do or behave a certain way, it’s not a bad thing that’s what the Military requires to be successful. We are a broken society when we don’t know how to undue the work we have done to these Warriors. We know now, it doesn’t need to be undone, it needs to be embraced in communities that understand and know how to interact and work together. We need to embrace these Veterans until they have the skills necessary, or the muscle memory needed to function in our civilian communities.

“Not calling in sick to work, just because I’m not feeling 100%” –PPH

“I have a bad habit of working until someone is basically forcing me to go home when I'm sick” –DT

“I managed to break this recently. I’ve been out for 7 years, and it took until late last year to finally come to terms with the fact that I’m given sick time for a reason” –DLB

“The limit of things I can carry in my left hand does not exist” --CP

“I still need my right hand empty” --AM

“No matter what I'm carrying, there's still room for a 12 pack” –T

“Damn, I never thought about this. I have been out for 45 years and still do this. I need that right hand to unlock and open the door” --RN

At the American Warriors Foundation, we don’t focus on faults or limitations—we celebrate what our heroes do best. My greatest success as a leader came not from force or control, but from discovering each veteran’s unique strengths and empowering them to shine. Together, we can build a future where every veteran thrives. Join us, be part of this transformative journey!

“Calling everyone Idk, fucker. doesn't translate well to the civilian side” –ER

“Shoelaces left over right, moving with a purpose, being early for everything, little patience for incompetence, expectation of accountability from people I work with (if you screw up own it, it’ll help you. If you hide it, you’re on your own), up early, sick sense of humor” --AS

“All my hangers face the same way” --FD

“This got my attention. Can't tell if it's my service history or my autism, though” –EGE

“I hate hearing my first name. When people call me by my first name, there's almost a delay in my brain before I realize they're talking to / about me” –HB

“I took some shit for saying this in a thread here a few weeks ago, but I still take my hat off when I enter a building. It's just my way of being respectful, but apparently some folks think that it's simp behavior” –EGE

“Field stripping a cigarette butt. ETS’d in 92” –WMW  (ETS (Expiration Term of Service) that’s getting out)

“ I’ve learned to just try to enjoy the habits engraved into me , I can’t help it but to leave so damn early I always arrive everywhere 25-15 mins early so I’ll just sit in the car and scroll on reddit or whatever, my body is always inclined to wake up early and do some type of PT so I also included just mental mapping my day out instead of listening to music to help me plan and lay things out more clearly, to be honest getting out the military sucks because the small things ingrained in you don’t seem to shake off because they aren’t major enough to really hold you back in life so the brain doesn’t look at it as a threat but it’s noticeable enough to make you realize you are not the same as anyone else around you in the civilian sector” –IS

 There is no all-encompassing answer because these are people with their own experiences and life challenges, each one different and each treatment or therapy or vocation must be as diverse. The two things they all have in common.

 They all volunteered for US and they need US now, like we needed them then.

We will work until there is no more to do to help these, Warriors. May God continue to Bless you, and your families.

Thank You

American Warriors Foundation